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Joke of the Day
"Every cab is the cash cab if you've got a gun."
Next Joke
"""I always feel so self-conscious when I'm out in public,"" I told my girlfriend. ""Don't worry, you aren't that ugly,"" she sniggered. I said, ""No, but you are."""
"Fellas, If you kill a spider while you're at her place, congratulations. You will be having sex. P.S. Bring a spider."
"Did you hear about the couple who stole a calendar? They both got six months."
"What do you call a pig that took a plane? Swine flu!"
"Shakespeare walks into a bar and the barmen says... ""Get out! You're Bard"""
"A nun was losing sleep over whether or not to take up sewing She heard it could be habit-forming"
"The only highlight of a brutal moving day: Wife: ""That's way too big to fit in the back door."" 4 people in unison: ""That's what she said!"""
"When cooking, I sometimes talk to my knife. I talk to it about my current life situations. The knife tells me I'm crazy. It tends to be pretty sharp about these things, so I guess it has a point."
"I'm gonna hang a Batman outfit in my closet to screw with me when I get Alzheimer's"