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Joke of the Day

"If this doughnut and chocolate milk are going to take years off my life, could I have them remove 1978-1982?"

"Ronda Rousey says she contemplated suicide. Holly Holm declined the rematch though."

"NCAA Hockey needs to re-name brackets. How is Alaska in the NE? They can see Russia."

"If I was a plastic surgeon I'd probably spend my free time putting tiny breast implants in my toes."

"Why did the Energizer Bunny go to prison? He was charged with battery."

"So I was asked the past tense of 'think' in a English test today I thought and thought and thought and finally wrote 'thunk'."

"A black guy and a white guy fall from a tree. Who hits the ground first? Better question would be: Why were they in the tree in the first place?"

"Good Music Jokes? I want to see what the community can come up with."

"All of Ariel's mer-sisters' names started with A too. More like keeping up with the Karsplashians."

"Doctor Nervous by Three year old When my three-year-old was told to pee in a cup at the doctor's office, he unexpectedly got nervous. With a shaking voice, he asked, ""Do I have to drink it?"""