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Joke of the Day

"I like my woman the way I like my coffee. Hot, black, and all over my lap while I'm driving."

"Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool I gave him a glass of water"

"I got probed by an alien last night Its true what they say, Mexicans do work good with their hands"

"I appreciate the transparency Domino's pizza tracker provides, but updates like ""Carl dropped your pizza"" & ""5 second rule"" are a bit much."

"Roses are red, violets are blue. If he's busy on Christmas, the side chick is you!"

"Why did the cookie get fired from his job? He came to work baked."

"The secret to success is to start from scratch and keep scratching."

"I bought perforated paper once It was a total rip off"

"They say best friends are hard to find: well that's cause the best ones are already mine...:)"

"Why do pedophiles love reddit? There are so many immature assholes."