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Joke of the Day

"So Jesus can turn a Glass of Water into Wine Last night my drunk friend could turn a Glass of Water into Puke."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Clark ! Clark who ? Clark your car in the garage !"

"I fell in love at first sight. I should have looked twice."

"I text this girl who was renting a room in my house ""I want to lick you out"" If she likes the text then I go with it, if not I blame predictive text and it was meant to say ""I want to kick you out""."

"What do you call a doctor that graduated at the bottom of their class? Doctor."

"If someone shows up at my house unannounced, I won't open the door. I just stand on the other side of the glass shaking my head no."

"I'm a lot like an iPhone 4. Girls always leave me in bars and my face is busted"

"My wife and her twin were standing next to each other in the kitchen Well, long story short, I grabbed the wrong butt and my brother in law was not amused"

"A member of the Army Corps of Engineers was working on the design of the bottom of an android ""What exactly is going on?"", I asked. He replied, ""A Major engineering feet."""

"A recent study shows 9 out of 10 men admit their wife is always right. Since the study 1 man has still not been able to be found."