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Joke of the Day

"North Korean civilians have been playing the Hunger Games since the 1950s."

"My stepladder is so great, I'm almost glad my ladders got divorced."

"What is the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair"

"Did you hear about the recent kidnapping? It's okay, she woke up."

"Ate a whole box of donuts. But I ate them *really* fast so hopefully that counts as a workout and balances out the calories."

"I'm fairly certain that kids only have ears for decorative purposes."

"What do you call a blind german? A not-see (Nazi)."

"Sometimes you need a little distance to see things clearly, but other times it is obviously a bear and you should probably just run"

"I made it halfway to Mexico before I realized that those sirens were just coming from the song on my radio."

"To those of you who received a book from me as a Christmas present: just to let you know that they are due back at the library tomorrow."