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Joke of the Day

"How many kids with ADD does it take to change a light bulb? Wanna go ride bikes? My all time favorite joke. Sorry if it has already been posted but who has the time to browse all of r/jokes."

"I almost choken on food and the whole time it was happening I was just thinking ""What a cliche way for a fat person to die of"""

"It might seem unusual to feed a horse using one's anus. Butt hay, who am I to judge?"

"""So what kind of work do you do?"" ""I move cows"" ""Oh , so you're a rancher?"" ""Not really , I'm a zumba instructor"""

"I had a dream where I was eating a ten pound marshmallow. Where the hell is my pillow?"

"What's the difference between golfers and skydivers? Golfers: *smack* Shit! Skydivers: Shit! *smack*"

"How do you circumcise a Trump supporter? Kick his sister in the jaw."

"I judge every book by its cover: ""Too smart for me"" is what I say and then look at Twitter on my phone."

"Oliver Twist: ""Please sir, I want some more!?"" Manger: ""Kid, you do realize this is a buffet?"""

"I'm going to write ""I miss you"" on a rock. Then throw it at your face. I just want you to know how much it hurts.."