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Joke of the Day

"ISIS is knocking on my door recruiting... Cause I just bombed this physics test."

"Why couldn't the amputee rob the bank... Because he was unarmed"

"Too bad the Kardashian show couldn't be like ""The Ring"" and kill anyone who watches it."

"Whenever someone mentions rat poison part of me imagines a tiny rodent cover band playing 80s power ballads."

"A woman went to get implants in her butt However, her butt was instead injected with cement. I guess you could say she hit rock bottom"

"STAGES OF DRUNK: 1. Wow. I can dance. 2. All hats look GOOD on me. 3. Shhh. Don't wake up the cows."

"What do you call the CFO of a landscaping company? A hedge fund manager"

"What did Blizzard do on Warcraft's opening night? Farm gold in China."

"Clinton didn't faint due to heat exhaustion... ... she was just doing her steel beam impression."

"What did Sigmund Freud say when he had an epiphany? Urethra!"