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Joke of the Day

"What's the similarity between American waitresses and the Jewish community? They both believe in tip shaming."

"4-year-old: Are hot dogs made from real dogs? Me: Would you eat them if they were? 4: No! Me: 4: Unless I had ketchup."

"The kid next door just challenged me to a water fight, so I thought I'd tweet this while I wait for the water to boil..."

"In the sentence of life, the devil may be a comma - but never let him be the period."

"I broke my leg while visiting America At least I got a good taste of their hospitality."

"What do you call an Irish girl sitting on a hot griddle holding a piece of cheese? A paddy melt!!"

"Just once I want to see a highway raised by its loving biological parents."

"How do you measure how funny an electrical engineer is? You use an o-silly-scope!"

"Do you know why Adele crossed the steet? To say hello from the other side :P"

"You'd think a baby would make the perfect paperweight, but this one keeps rolling off my desk."