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Joke of the Day

"""Happy birthday! "" - Oh wow! A necklace! I love- wait... Did you get me a fake diamond? ""Well, it's not really your 29th birthday either"""

"If I'm ever on life support unplug me Then plug me back in see if that works"

"What instrument do skeletons play? A trombone!"

"Hey, new Beatles fans! The fuck have you been doing for the last 50 years? Every record shop would like to know before they close forever."

"What did Goku say when he heard his wife listening to the song, ""Fancy""? Aye, Chi-Chi, Why?"

"Four out of five people enjoy gang rape you sick bastard"

"It's not necrophilia if she was alive when I started."

"Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms. Bonus: Knock knock. Who's there? Not the little girl... EDIT: Pardon the crappy delivery, english isn't my fist language. ;)"

"They say you are what you eat, but I don't remember eating a massive disappointment."

"What do you call a pot smoker that spends every night dancing and drinking with his friends? A Rastapartying"