202920

Joke of the Day

"Hey, new Beatles fans! The fuck have you been doing for the last 50 years? Every record shop would like to know before they close forever."

"This sub is so inactive There hasn't been a post all year!"

"Eye contact with the McDonald's drive-thru cashier is a shame-filled mistake."

"I've found that nowadays most people don't like holding hands in public. Especially if you don't know them."

"[Bunch of 6 year olds knock on my door] ""TRICK OR TREAT!"" You kids are in for a real treat... *slips each of them a copy of my demo tape*"

"Guys I'm like next to Austria right now... Hungary, I could really go for a cheeseburger..."

"Why are Americans bad at league of legends? Because they can't defend their towers!...i'm gonna get stabbed"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Alberta ! Alberta who ! Alberta'll be over in a minute !"

"My oldest is 14 today. Daddy's baby is growing up. Soon she'll start looking for boyfriends and find them all dead under the floor boards."

"ppl: are u sick? me: no, im just ugly"