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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend is adorable, smart, sexy, and looking over my shoulder as I type."

"What do you call two guys with no arms and no legs hanging over a window? Kurt and Rod"

"After my sixth cup of coffee, I feel like Mario after he gets one of those bouncing, flashing stars."

"How many rednecks does it take to eat a possum? Two. One to eat it, another to look out for traffic!"

"Saw a girl with 12 nipples today. Sounds crazy, dozen tit?"

"I told my friend not to play Pokemon Go in India You won't just find a Pikachu there, you'll also find a gang banging you."

"""911? Help, my house is burning down!"" ""Sir, we're sending the fire brigade right now."" ""I HAVE ENOUGH FIRE I DON'T NEED A BRIGADE OF IT."""

"What is the most effective way of cleaning a cum stain? Baby wipes"

"If we have learned anything from the Friday the 13th movies, it's that Jason mainly kills people having sex. Most of you should be good."

"The most exercise I get from my exercise ball is when I move it around in my apartment so that it's not in my way."