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Joke of the Day

"""911? Help, my house is burning down!"" ""Sir, we're sending the fire brigade right now."" ""I HAVE ENOUGH FIRE I DON'T NEED A BRIGADE OF IT."""

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"I was telling a friend how Jewish people call god by another name, and he was like ""No way!"", and I was like... ""No, seriously. They do."""
"What Rock group has four men who don't sing? Mount Rushmore."
"I'll bet Miss Piggy kissed a lot of princes before she found her frog."
"I saw an attractive woman spank her kid in McDonalds after he threw his fries on the ground, so I also threw mine on the ground."
"When Miley Cyrus... When Miley Cyrus gets naked and licks a hammer, it's ""Art"" and ""Music. When I do it, I'm ""Wasted"" and ""have to leave Home Depot"""
"If a tree falls in the forest with no one around to hear it... Does a hipster still buy the soundtrack?"
"What did one sea say to the other sea? Nothing, they just waved."
"What do you call it when your Stepmother poops? A Step-Stool"
"What kind of story does a rabbit tell? A fluffy tale."
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