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Joke of the Day
"Why do accountants get excited on Saturdays? They can wear casual clothes to work"
Next Joke
"How did the farmer find his girlfriend? He tractor!"
"Have you heard about the new female doctor who can cure illness with all natural, homeopathic remedies? Look her up! She just goes by the name, ""Miss Information"" Edit: source - South Park"
"Masking tape never makes a very realistic mask."
"Me *writing*: she was like 12 slices of key lime pie in a dress- tart, cool, totally whipped. Her: I can hear you. Me: she could hear me"
"For Jesus this was anything but a Good Friday."
"Terrorists are so slutty They'll blow on the first date"
"Before you judge someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you judge them, you're a mile away AND you have their shoes."
"After a disappointing summer, Humpty Dumpty ended up having a great fall."
"How is Donald Trump going to get rid of the Mexicans if elected? Pesticide"