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Joke of the Day

"I just Googled 'Nicolas Cage jokes' and it showed me a list of every film he's been in. Well played, Google."

"Why did 5000 Mexicans show up to fight at the Alamo? They only had two cars."

"Kristen gave Sally 3 flowers and 2 stuffed animals. Todd gave Sally 5 flowers and 3 stuffed animals. What does Sally have? Cancer."

"If a stork brings white babies, and a blackbird black babies, what bird brings no babies? A Swallow."

"What disease do police give black people? Glock coma"

"What's the difference between an egg and a wank? You can beat an egg."

"Phones these days are so expensive... If you fall and hear a crack, you hope you broke your leg."

"What do you call a homeless horse with a Borderline Personality Disorder ? Unstable."

"People fear what they don't understand: Change Death 4th grade math word problems"

"Son, always wait 30 minutes after eating before swimming ""But dad we're goldfish"" Oh yeah, I forgot ""Forgot what?"""