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Joke of the Day
"Why is the British weather like Islam? Because it's either Sunni or Shi'ite"
Next Joke
"When hoes say, new year new me... they really mean new guys, new dick."
"How did Hitler tie his shoes? In knotsies. (The unfollow button is only a click away)"
"Bikini season is right around the corner...But so is Chipotle"
"[ER] HIPSTER: I fell off my acoustic motorcycle & broke my mustache twirler. DOC:... H: I fell off my bike & broke my hand. D: Rub kale on it."
"You've cat to be kitten me right meow."
"I try to say at least one bad thing about somebody after they die just to counter all the compliments they're getting."
"I was hanging out with some lesbians... Yes, I do have a penis. But don't worry, I won't hold it against you."
"German people are so rude. I helped someone in Berlin and all he did was call me ""donkey."""
"How to kiss: 1-open your mouth 2-wider 3-wider 4-unhinge jaw 5-summon the Dark Overlord"