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Joke of the Day

"What is a lesbians favorite day of the week? Tuesday"

"Why was the glow worm unhappy ? Because her children weren't that bright !"

"I grounded my kid from electronics for a week and now he won't stop talking to me and I think I've made a horrible mistake."

"What's your favorite racial (but not racist) joke? How many South Americans does it take to screw in a light bulb? A Brazilian!"

"What has four legs and goes ""Oom! Oom!""? A cow walking backwards!"

"*Looking in the mirror* Fix hair. Check teeth. Fix hair. Check butt. Fix hair. Side check. Suck in. Side check. Fix hair. *Sighs* walks..."

"I Want To Be Pampered! Actually, any brand will do."

"Dark humor is like a child with cancer... It never gets old"

"What's the first thing a cannibal does in the morning? Grab a cup of joe."

"5: I went potty. Me: Did you remember to wipe this time? 5: No. Me: Why? 5: It's faster my way. I don't know how to counter that argument."