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Joke of the Day

"I accidentally had two energy drinks today and now my house is decorated for Christmas."

"I'm extending the weekend one MORE day for everyone. I talked to your boss, (s)he said no problem as long as you dress slutty on wed."

"I tried to convert to Judaism, but they rejected me when they found out I was uncircumcised. I guess I just didn't make the cut."

"Wanna hear a racist joke ? Donald Trump"

"Why'd God make women pretty but dumb? They're pretty, so men will like them. They're dumb, so they will like men. Courtesy of the great movie Ip Man 3 which I watched yesterday."

"What did the right pussy lip tell the left pussy lip? We used to be tight"

"If your girlfriend says she's going out to run some errands and comes back with 6 bags from the mall... You might be dating my wife."

"Why does it take 2 feminists to screw in a lightbulb? One to screw in the lightbulb and one to give me a blow job while I supervise."

"Question starts with a Q... ...and ends with an E."

"How does a dishwasher make his money? Panhandling"