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Joke of the Day

"I am so sorry to hear about your grandma... I know what you're going through my phone dies all the time."

"Where Did it go? Where did that list of dark jokes posted this morning go? Iv looked everywhere."

"It should be legal to shoot people who speed up only to keep you from passing."

"How do you organize a space party you planet"

"Who is the coolest guy at the hospital? The ultra sound guy. And who covers when hes off sick? The hip replacement guy."

"I made a bold statement by not buying two night-stands for my bedroom. I'm a one night stand kind of man."

"Today I made an immigration officer laugh He was borderline hysterical."

"What do you get if you cross a steer and a chicken? Roost beef!"

"How did that bullfight come out? Oh it was a toss-up!"

"What kind of breath freshener does George Clinton use? Parlia-mints"