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Joke of the Day

"What happens when someone mixes Francium, Oxygen, Tungsten, and Nitrogen after it explodes? The chemist may frown."

"I'm sorry, the number you have dialed is imaginary. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again."

"There are two kinds of people in this world. Those who pee in the shower.. and fucking liars."

"What do you get if you insert human DNA into a monkey? AIDS for humanity"

"What does a baby computer call its father? Data"

"What rock group has 4 men that do not sing? Mt. Rushmore"

"i'm writing a book on overcoming foot pain it's called the agony of defeat"

"What is the difference between Hitler and Michael Phelps? Michael Phelps can actually finish a race..."

"Be the change you're looking for between the couch cushions."

"Did you guys hear about the homeopath who forgot to take his meds? He died of an overdose."