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Joke of the Day

"A valentine? IN THIS ECONOMY?!?"

"They say innocence is always found in the children. This has only made it more difficult for me to understand why so many pedophiles are found guilty."

"I'm the girl who shows up at a Halloween party where everyone is dressed as something sexy and I'm dressed as a bean bag."

"What do you get when you mix a boxer and cocaine? A punchline"

"I'm a strict vegetarian. After I kill a cow I don't eat ANY of it."

"Knock Knock! - Who's there? - Dingo! - Dingo who? - MANDINGO!!!"

"[soup kitchen] *homeless man is handed a plate* What the hell is this? -Turkey bacon. *throws tray against wall* I'm hungry! Not desperate!"

"With the recent events in the news... My Facebook friends list is starting to look like the French revolution."

"damn girl are you my old Gamecube? because for some reason i cant turn you on anymore but we used to have alot of fun"

"imagined Beyonce taking a dump and it ruined my morning"