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Joke of the Day

"My illiterecy got me fired from the box moving company. I was so confused, I didn't know which way was up."

"How many cops does it take to push a black guy down the stairs? None, he 'fell'."

"Why was the lion alone and disheartened? He lost his pride in a bet"

"You know what's the biggest turn off for me? Consent."

"What do you call a giant elephant mafia boss that owns slaves? Masta-Don."

"I'm hoping the nuclear strike button & the trap-door for hecklers button on Trump's desk are completely different colours."

"[crime scene] *detective snaps pics of murder victim* Corpse: delete it"

"How did Christopher Columbus find India? He used Apple Maps."

"When a package says ""Easy Open"" I end up using scissors, knife, hammer, gun and a lightsaber."

"The speed in which a woman says ""nothing"" when asked ""what's wrong"" is inversely proportional to the severity of the shitstorm that's coming."