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Joke of the Day

"Photographers are the worst! They frame you, then shoot you, then hang you on the wall."

"A Prius just tried to race me from a stop sign. I totally had it for the first 100 feet, but I can only walk so fast."

"Bathrooms have Changed from being a Singing Studio, to a Photo Studio."

"I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer I saw it through my telescope last night."

"She: ""Give it to me, I'm soo wet! give it to me!"" Me: She can scream all she wants but the umbrella is mine."

"Why was Eric Clapton arrested? He was fingering A minor."

"A rabbi and a priest are walking past a park, where they see a group of boys playing football The priest says ""Let's go over and screw them kids."" The rabbi replies ""Out of what?"""

"Sorry I can't come to your thing tonight, I'm too busy figuring out an excuse about why I can't come to your thing next week"

"What did the CPU say to the RAM? Sorry to cache you out but I want the data closer. The RAM replied: you're right, ""life"" is too short."

"A legume broke out of prison today Police are looking for the escapea."