200236

Joke of the Day

"I hate it when people tell me I don't need alcohol to have fun. You don't need shoes to run, but it fucking helps."

"Volkswagen are a bunch of cheats... Audi you think they Passat their diesel tests for all these years? They would have never Beetle their CCompetition if they hadn't."

"Valve is like a deadbeat dad.... They both do well on creating, but suck at taking care of the offspring."

"Na Fa Fo Na Na Fo Fo -Sassy black girl giving me her digits."

"Birthdays can be really nice But I heard too many of them can kill you"

"Here's a Post Office joke Nevermind, you'll probably never get it."

"Tips to reduce weight: First turn your head to the right, then turn it to the left. Repeat this every time you are offered something to eat."

"*comes home from poker night earlier than usual looks at wife while picking up the dog and leaves without saying anything*"

"Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl go to the toilet? Because the P is silent!"

"""Heh. This guy doesn't even know I ate his candy bar."", Tom snickered."