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Joke of the Day

"Arguing with a woman is like reading a software license agreement... ...in the end, you ignore it all and click ""I agree""."

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"[OC] Got approved for a 15 year 3.25% Mortgage loan 4.20 was too high for a 30 year ....... sorry I'll see myself out."
"What is a fat kids' favourite sounding instrument at school? The dinner bell."
"My husband fell asleep while watching Memento...was shocked to find ""remember to NOT trust your wife"" written on his forehead with a Sharpie"
"Thought I had $707 in my bank account, turns out it was ""LOL"" and I was holding my statement upside down."
"Target audience A nine year old kid disappeared after using a cream that makes you look 10 years younger."
"Him: Watch your language at dinner tonight. Me: So you want less Tarantino... H: ...and more Seuss. M: Gotcha. No swearing. Lots of rhyming."
"Don't click this post You'll reg-reddit"
"Airline food is getting worse and worse The passengers on the Germanwings flight said it tasted like they were literally eating rocks."
"co-pilot: ""ask in a way that won't panic everyone"" pilot: ""ok"" [via intercom] ""is there a fireman on the plane?"""