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Joke of the Day
"What is a fat kids' favourite sounding instrument at school? The dinner bell."
Next Joke
"There's only one thing I hate more that white supremacy. Black people"
"What's better Jesus or a picture of Jesus A picture because it only takes one nail to hang a picture."
"Me: sorry I rode a giraffe to your grandmas funeral Friend: what? that's not a giraffe Me: sorry I'm on drugs at your grandmas funeral"
"I wouldn't take a bullet for you but I'd definitely push someone in front of you to take it for you. Same thing."
"So Bruce Jenner might have been texting... Does this make him a transtextual? ....I'll see my way out"
"What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion? A piece of ass that will bring a tear to your eye."
"What the difference between meat and fish? If you beat your fish, it dies."
"Old man Johnson and his world-champion pole vaulting neighbor are really one in the same... They both grip their sticks and try to get it up."
"A local restaurant is having an election special... You get two small breasts, two fat thighs, and one left wing. Side-note: don't like Trump either don't obliterate me."