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Joke of the Day

"I wish Gene Wilder was still alive today... He'd probably be ecstatic knowing one of his oompa loompa's grew up to be president :')"

"How is being a pimp like being a farmer? You get some hoes and they get dough for you."

"the saddest part about self driving cars will be all the times people die mid trip and then ur dinner guests or pizza guy will arrive dead"

"What's it called when Batman leaves church early? Christian Bale."

"Be safety conscious. 80% of people are caused by accidents."

"What do you call lesbian eskimos? Klondykes"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Amanda ! Amanda who ? Amanda the table!"

"Women need to relax and stop worrying so much about their bodies. Men aren't picky! Unless you're chubby or have a wrinkle or something."

"I'm not sexist because being sexist is wrong And being wrong is for women."

"They say one in every 3 neighbors is a pedophile Thankfully there isn't one next to me... just 2 smoking hot 6 year olds."