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Joke of the Day
"Be safety conscious. 80% of people are caused by accidents."
Next Joke
"Cripple jokes are terrible... I just cant stand them..."
"A co-worker has stopped acknowledging me in the hallway. Please tell me what I did to make you want to ignore me, so I can do it to others."
"Never treat someone like an iPhone when they treat you like a BlackBerry."
"I called the pet store to ask if they sell exotic cats. ""Yes"" he said. ""Serval Varieties"" ^I ^better ^see ^some ^horrible ^retaliatory ^puns ^in ^the ^comments"
"A boomerang walks into a bar... Bartender says, ""Hey, I thought I threw you out of here!"""
"I survived Sharknado, but my friends didn't... ... I miss those chums"
"News said how hard it'd be to shoplift a turkey. Amateurs. It's all about commitment. *stuffs turkey under shirt* *whines that back hurts*"
"I was casually swimming with a great white shark today. Until he bit my whole arm off."
"Jesus may have walked on water but Steven Hawking runs.. ..on batteries."