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Joke of the Day

"Hey girl are you from Tennessee? Because I was wondering if you'd still be interested in me if I wasn't your cousin"

"What do you call those things on either side of an old lady's belly button? Her tits"

"Whaddaya call a blind nun? A roamin' catholic."

"*watches How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days* pfft... I could do it in 8"

"What do you get if you cross an owl and a rooster? A cock thats up all night!"

"A couple of letters drove out to the desert and took all their clothes off. They were arrested by the sands sheriff."

"[flirting w/girl at bar] And that's why [takes sip from elephant sippy cup] I always use a sippy cup [lid falls off and spills juice on me]"

"Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only Tennessee."

"An atheist, a vegan and a femenist walked into a bar. And everyone knew it instantly."

"Before I tell my wife something important, I take both her hands in mine. That way she can't hit me with them."