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Joke of the Day

"My boys and I plan to rob the super glue factory.. By the way the plan looks, things will be hard to pull off."

"Superbowl Champion Minnesota Vikings"

"Three guys walk into a bar... And their families are slowly torn apart by alcoholism. (Edit: typo pointed out by grammar Nazi)"

"2 Transformers got married Soon thereafter, they had a baby Transformer. But at that moment when they had a baby, they suddenly could not be seen anymore. They had become Transparents."

"I asked two Uber drivers to pick each other up and am watching them chase each other in circles around my block until they run out of gas."

"What do you call a couple of asses standing next to eachother in an asparagus field? An ass-pair, I guess?"

"I enjoy reading, long walks on the beach, and getting myself into situations where the only way out is to fake my own death."

"LAMP FOR SALE: gold, antique, good patina, evil genie, functions like new, you will be killed, shiny, polished, be careful what you wish for"

"Why did the father of the asian couple know the baby was not his? Because two Wongs don't make a white"

"*flips cap backwards* son, let's keep it real *puts on another cap* the realest *puts on suit made of backwards caps* REALality. word."