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Joke of the Day
"What is a priest's favorite candy? Sacramentos"
Next Joke
"Why does Heisenberg hate driving? He gets lost every time he checks the speedometer."
"Where's Finnick? Odair he is! Obligatory: My brother told this to me while watching Mockingjay P2."
"What did the mama pig say when junior pig bought a basket of wormy apples? ""Don't tell the farmer. He might charge us extra."""
"I just heard about it and I totally think I am... What if I'm a hypochondriac?"
"SKRILLEX must be really clumsy... ...he just keeps dropping his bass"
"Dad: ""A little bird told me you are doing drugs"" Son: ""You're talking to birds, and I'm the one doing drugs?"""
"Did you hear about the lactose intolerant man who ate a whole wheel of cheese? it was not gouda for him later."
"What do you call it when water is poured over a clock? Time dilution."
"I bet r/clocks is blowing up right now. [x-post from Showerthoughts]"