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Joke of the Day

"[On a date] Date: So what do you do? Me: I'm a taxidermist Date: Oh... wow. Fox: And a ventriloquist"

"A father of four finds out hes months behind on child support... *[deleted] 1 hour ago (0 children)*"

"Q. What's the difference between a line dance instructor and a dentist? A. A dentist lets you sit down while he hurts you."

"why don't you see elephants hiding in the trees that often? because they're really fucking good at it"

"Smoking is actually a good thing for me Look how often I have to go outside into the fresh air"

"Not a gardener per se.... but I've been known to use hoes occasionally."

"I'm never a more ineffective parent than when I accidentally make threats that rhyme."

"Is Monica Lewinsky good at the piano? I don't know about the piano, but she sucks at the organ."

"Day 1: Brad wears no pants Day 2: Brad wears no pants Day 3: Brad wears no pants ... ... This is just a bottomless Pitt"

"What do you call a faggot with an axe? A Fascist"