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Joke of the Day

"[batteries in my TV remote die for the first time since I bought it 4 years ago] ""Useless piece of shit."""

"What do you call the kids claiming ""We don't need no education""? Comfortably Dumb"

"I test drove a Kia today It wasn't really my Forte"

"If Jesus were alive today...what type of car would he drive? A chrysler (Christler)"

"I've never smoked weed before but the frequency with which I pass out, hand in a bag of snack chips, leads me to believe I'd be good at it."

"Toronto Police have found a head, hands, and a foot in a river. There are no theories yet but the hokey pokey has not been ruled out."

"Have you ever tasted Ethiopian food... Neither have they."

"What do you call a really really big ant? A GIANT! Now what do you call a baby ant? an Infant! What do you call an ant thats into business? A Merchant! please post more ant jokes if you know of any."

"I was thinking of telling you guys a gay joke. Butt fuck it..."

"Q: Where can you find an ocean without any water? A: On a map!"