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Joke of the Day

"How many potatoe does it take to kill a Latvian? none (inspired by /u/aces613 )"

"[meeting] DIRECTOR: I want amazing CGI PRODUCER: Yes! D: A huge cast P: Agreed! D: Realistic family photos P: We don't have the budget"

"Failed my wasp collection exam. Got a bee."

"My mom said follow your dreams, So I went back to bed."

"Corny Japanese Cartoons Ani-maize ...I'll leave now."

"What is Romeo and Juliet's least favorite fruit? Can't- elope!"

"They said I had a small penis, but they'll see. They'll ALL see! Nevermind actually, that's illegal"

"Just my luck... ""I sure do like your finger in my pussy, but your ring hurts."" ""Uh, I'm not wearing any rings. Baby, that's my wristwatch..."""

"What are the other letters of the alphabet? Nazis."

"I wrote 2793 tweets in advance. So if I die tomorrow, you won't know until 2018."