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Joke of the Day

"volcano (n.) [vol-key-noh] A mountain getting its rocks off."

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"Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because Jewish women won't touch anything unless it's 10% off"
"What does Bill Cosby put in his garden? Rapeseeds."
"How much is twelve units of mass? Dozen matter."
"What would you call a 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback? The 45 cent show"
"Would Bill Cosby make a shitty bartender?"
"What did she say while cleaning herself after sex? Well, that's a load off my shoulder"
"My uncle was found dead in his office last night by cleaning staff. I'm glad because he wore Crocs to my wedding in 2006."
"Melania Trump doesn't want to live in the same place as her husband. More than half of America feels the same way."
"Hey single ladies, you want a boyfriend? Easy! Learn to shut the fuck up and dramatically lower your standards!"