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Joke of the Day

"I heard that people from Taiwan are impatient and agressive... I guess they have a Taipei personality."

"If Batman and Catwoman had a kid it would be called Batcat; or the more unfortunate ManWoman."

"Damn you bladder stop releasing my precious beer."

"Whats the worst thing you could say as a doctor? I have over 300 confirmed kills"

"Did you hear about the new anti-consumerism movement? Nobody's buying it!"

"Me: Time travel Interviewer: what's your biggest stren- holy shit"

"Why don't you buy sunscreen from Steve Irwin? Because it doesn't protect you from harmful rays"

"When I grow up I want to be a fire truck... I want to be big, red and have 8 men in me at once"

"I'm not flirting, I'm being friendly. *gets on knees and undoes your belt*"

"What did Abe Lincoln say after a three day drinking binge? ""Wait... I freed ***WHO***?!?!?"""