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Joke of the Day

"If Batman and Catwoman had a kid it would be called Batcat; or the more unfortunate ManWoman."

"Doctor Doctor When I press with my finger here... it hurts and here... it hurts and here... and here... What do you think is wrong with me? You have a broken finger!"

"Her: If I get fat will you break up with me? Me: No but you're now just two more inane questions away from being buried in the garden."

"Patron 1: I eat at a different restaurant every day. Patron 2: I don't tip either."

"What does a donkey say? It says ""Hey Shrek, whats up?"" (I was 9 when i made this okay)"

"I went out with a girl the other night who turned out to be really weird I guess the fact that she said she was a communist should have been a big red flag"

"Which bird is always out of breath ? A puffin !"

"My Jewish mate has been with his Tourette's suffering girlfriend for years now. I always wondered what kept them together. Then I saw the swear jar."

"Science at its finest. Why are all subatomic particles gay? Because they are all atoms"

"Knock Knock Who's there? Heisenberg Heisenberg who? I am the one who knocks *I'm bracing for a lot of downvotes*"