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Joke of the Day

"Police arrested two kids in my neighborhood today. One was drinking battery acid the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off."

"What do you call a midget psychic that's on the run from the law? A small medium at large."

"Spell extra wise in two letters. YY (2 y's)"

"What happened to the man who owned a riding academy? Business kept falling off!"

"What did the Dalai Llama play on stage at Glastonbury? Yakmanninov"

"A woman isn't really heartbroken unless she does something drastic to her hair."

"Would you give a blowjob for a million dollars? Yes? Can I get a dollar's worth?"

"I am literally the only one at this baby shower who turned up with champagne & a coat hanger."

"What idiot named it balding & not vanishing into thin hair."

"What does it mean if you find a horse shoe? Some poor horse is walking around in his socks."