15442

Joke of the Day

"Army Jokes by Major Laugh"

"*gets naked* *gets baked* *doesn't get why they don't rhyme*"

"What does a redneck divorce and a burning meth lab have in common? Someone's losing a trailer."

"Am I a good person? No. But do I try to be better every single day? Also no"

"Let's hope no one builds a convenience store inside a volcano because that doesn't seem like it would be convenient at all."

"cop: could you please describe the man who tried to kill you me: yeah he was not nice"

"[At Last Supper] *Jesus raises bread* This is my body *raises wine* & my blood *pulls out 8 of Clubs* & this is your card *Apostles go nuts*"

"Have you heard of this new drug? The DEA just passed a new controversial drug to help treat lesbians with depression. It's called Tricoxagan."

"*Eats a Lean Cuisine *20 minutes go by. *Devours entire Pizza Hut store...including employees."

"I don't care what your bio says. You retweet me, it's not only an endorsement, it represents the views of your employer."