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Joke of the Day

"Who is Donald Trumps favorite Pixar character? WALL-E"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Claude ! Claude who ? Claudework Orange !"

"Why does the Catholic Church have so much money? Because Jesus saves."

"I was looking at the baseball, trying to figure out why it was getting larger. Then it hit me."

"What does a suicidal person say while leaving a party? I want to hang by myself for a bit. Edit: Not suicidal. Just gallows humor."

"He pasta way? Here today, gone tomato. You cannoli do so much before thyme is up. Never sausage a tragedy. Olive my thoughts are with you."

"What's the difference between a woman's argument and a knife? A knife has a point."

"What video game would Adolf Hitler play? Mein Kraft."

"Used a bag to pick up dog shit in yard, tiny ants all over it. Later, saw 2 ants on my arm. My body is now crawling w phantom dogshit ants."

"Yesterday Bill Clinton called Hillary, ""the ablest person I've ever worked with."" Well, I can see why he's a hit with the ladies."