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Joke of the Day

"I see wed people."

"What's Dr. Dre's favorite vegetable? Beets."

"What hand do you use to wipe your butt? Right or left? For those that answered right or left, you guys are gross I use toilet paper."

"Voting this year will be like going to the dentist... No one wants to do it, but we all know we should for our own good."

"Damn, girl! Are you Iocane Powder? Because I've spent the last few years of my life building up an immunity to Iocane Powder. So, yeah..."

"Why was the chessmaster interested in foreign women? He wanted a Czech mate."

"Why should you never sit at the top deck of a double decker bus? Because there is no driver up there."

"What's the difference between illegal and unlawful? One is against the law, the other is a sick bird."

"Why did the rap battle champion get the most spacious and accessible seat on the bus? Because of his dis-ability."

"note to TV shows: I do not want, nor will I ever want, a look inside the episode"