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Joke of the Day

"I'm starting to think that all those hours in school when I practiced writing my autograph was just a waste of time....."

"How many Police officers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they are too busy beating the shit out the room for being black."

"Seriously, why put the suicide hotline on the backs of buses? Put it on the fronts."

"I was surprised that my skin products kept moving around my medicine cabinet But it turns out it was just brownian lotion."

"Why was a happy couple weary to kiss at the gas station? They were scared of sparks flying."

"A grasshopper walks into a bar bartender says...""Hey, we have a drink named after you."" Grasshopper says ""You have a drink named Jeff?"". budum pshhhh."

"Joke Police arrested a drunkard & askd: Where r u going.. Man: I-m going 2 listen lecture on ill effects of drinking. Cop: Who-ll lecture at midnight .. Man: My wife.."

"Q: Why does Father Time wear bandages? A: Because day breaks and night falls."

"Girls are always the first to say ""YOLO"" Until I mention anal"

"What the Washington Fat Cats don't understand is that when they stopped making Doritos 3D we lost an entire dimension of flavor"