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Joke of the Day

"It seems racist that they call it Black Friday just because a bunch of people are trying to get into stores in the middle of the night."

"What do you call the new policing strategy of communities such as Ferguson, Missouri? A shot in the dark."

"I'm not racist, racism is a crime. And only black people commit crimes."

"I got a nice Rolex from the lesbian couple next door after they asked me what I wanted for my birthday. It's a cool gift and all, but I think they misunderstood me when I told them I wanna watch."

"My girlfriend wanted me to tease her so I was like ""alright fatty"""

"Are you a mum? I am not a dad! Maybe you could help me with that!"

"Awwww, she looks so sweet and peaceful when she's not yelling. -my kids, watching me sleep"

"Ever look in the fridge and be disappointed that all there is for supper is leftover pizza and beer? Yeah, me neither..."

"What sport are Mexicans best at? Cross country."

"My son has developed orange and white stripes on his body... Doctors have put him on a course of nemotherapy."