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Joke of the Day

"Never using online dating again. Last guy said he lived in a gated community. Prison. He meant prison."

"Bra & Hat What did the bra say to the hat? ""You go on ahead, while I give these two a lift."""

"How do you know the economy is only getting worse? On the latest episode of ""Celebrity Apprentice"", Donald Trump fired himself!"

"Why not use a see-through, clear plastic hang glider just to freak everyone out?"

"How do you tell a friend their breath stinks without being rude? ""I'm bored, let's brush our teeth!"""

"""Goodnight moon."" *Moon takes out one earbud* ""No, Pepsi is not ok."""

"Remake of Last tango in Paris butter scene What would the actress played by Maria Schneider say to Marlon Brando in the new version of famous butter scene: I can't believe it's not BUTTer !"

"I used to think I was a man of vision. Now i'm pretty sure they're hallucinations."

"What do you call a homosexual on roller skates? Rolaids"

"i went into the bar and ordered a Whiskey Osama... the batender asked ""what's that?"" i answered ""Two shots and a splash of water."""