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Joke of the Day

"When I have money, there's nothing to buy. When I don't have money, I want everything."

"Why doesn't Jesus participate in Battle Raps? All his comebacks take three days.."

"Tonight I realized that I gaze at cheese in much the same way that first time mothers gaze at their newborns"

"Someone on the New England Patriots is getting fired Whoever forgot to deflate the 12th ball"

"I have a joke from Germany Just kidding, we have no sense of humor."

"Taylor Swift seems like one of those chicks who thinks it's cute to put her bare feet on the dashboard of a car when riding shotgun."

"I disagree with the comments around here about feminists being fat, ugly, disgusting, whiny bitches... Some of them are just ugly."

"Five years ago I asked the most beautiful girl in the world out on a date, today I asked her to marry me. She said no both times."

"I don't think a lion would play golf But a Tiger Wood"

"Q: Why do blondes always drink with straws? A: Practice."