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Joke of the Day

"Taylor Swift seems like one of those chicks who thinks it's cute to put her bare feet on the dashboard of a car when riding shotgun."

"Yo mama joke(FNAF2) Yo mama is so ugly that even the puppet master was scared of her!"

"What part of a football ground is never the same? The changing rooms!"

"83% of white folks stressing about their court dates are referring to tennis."

"What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scottish sheep farmer? One says, 'Hey! You! Get off of my cloud!' The other says 'Hey! MacLeod! Get off of my ewe.'"

"therapist: ""remember there are no stupid questions"" wife: ""okay"" therapist: ""keith you start"" me: ""do sharks ever need to have a bath?"""

"Me: Just a glass of water Scientist waiter: You mean a glass of... yourself? You see, the body is made up of ok ok sit down I'll bring it"

"My irony detector is defective. It detects everything except irony."

"I have a dream that my son will one day live in a nation where he will not be judged by the size of his boat but by the motion of his ocean."

"Netflix and chill is cool... But let's be honest guys, we know for most of you it's Netflix and Jill Edit: if you don't know who Jill is, take a look at your hand."