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Joke of the Day

"I tried to catch fog yesterday. But I mist"

"What's Better, British or German Sausages British, because German are the Wurst..."

"We should call them Whether Men, because they don't know whether or not it's going to rain, get it? That's a good one."

"A vegan, an atheist, and a crossfitter walk into a bar... I only know because they told everybody"

"Stop. Stop it right now. I'm going to count to five. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. ~A parenting haiku."

"What is the difference between a GOOD and a BAD girl? A GOOD girl goes to a party, goes home then goes to bed. A BAD girl goes to a party, goes to bed then goes home."

"Where did the team get there uniforms? New Jersey"

"What if Stephen Hawking was the real Slim Shady? And we will never know because he can't stand up."

"The last thing my wife gave me before she died... ... was her epi pen. I don't know why, but it seemed like she thought it was very important that I have it."

"There are two types of men in the world... Men that pee in the sink Men that lie"