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Joke of the Day
"How do you beat someone in an argument? Use your fists."
Next Joke
"Holiday Tip: if you boil a turd on low heat the whole house smells like farts."
"What do most people wear to court? Law-suits"
"What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot. :^)"
"[in Walmart] ""Excuse me, do you have towels?"" ""Oh, I don't work here."" [leans in close] ""I don't give a shit where you work."""
"The worst part about being homeschooled is getting bullied."
"What's a cow's favorite chemical? molybdenum monoxide MoO"
"What was the catchiest thing of 2014? Ebola"
"[after solid first date] Ok play it cool, don't wanna seem too eager.. *texts her 47 years later* ""Had a great time the other night :)"""
"My wife was cremated after her death. Also during."