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Joke of the Day
"My wife was cremated after her death. Also during."
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"""I still haven't met his Father, but I'm not worried. Parents love me."" - Jesus' gay friend"
"Lame number joke: Why is 8 scared of 7? Becaauuuussseee 7 8(ate) 9. You get it huh?"
"I could tell you some great jokes about unemployed people... But none of them work."
"My sick friend said a cold never bothered him anyways. I asked him if he wanted to build a snotman"
"Capitalization... It's the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse, and helping your uncle jack off a horse."
"After retiring from the sport, a snooker player takes up camera work... The director gets a shock when he tells him to make sure his cues are good or he might as well shove them up his backside."
"Mickey Mouse's lawyer calls... ...And tells him, ""Mickey, you can't divorce Minnie because shes 'crazy'"" and Mickey responds, ""I didn't say she was crazy, i said she was fucking goofy!"""
"Zombies are categorically asexual as they are more interested in taking head than giving head."
"What is Santa saying to Mrs. Claus right now? I told you it would rain, dear."