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Joke of the Day

"I'm a wreck if I don't get my full 18 hours of sleep"

"What the difference between a catholic priest and a pimple? Pimples wait until puberty to come on your face."

"What's the difference between Swine flu, and Bird flu? one requires 'oinkment' and the other needs 'tweetment'. i'm sorry."

"What did Hellen Keller not see when she fell? ..... the floor"

"Skinny = anorexic , thick = obese , virgin = too good , non-virgin = slut , friendly = fake , quiet = rude. You can never please society"

"The Bride of Frankenstein Dr. Frankenstein: I took the Bride Of Frankenstein to the Caribbean last month. Igor: Jamaica? Dr. Frankenstein: Yes."

"What do you call it when one bull spies on another bull? A steak-out!"

"What would the Reddit political party be called? The know-kn0thing party."

"I was in the shower when I had a miscarriage. Worst baby shower ever."

"Why do doctor's offices take your blood pressure AFTER weighing you? Of course it's going to be high then."