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Joke of the Day

"How can you tell when Ron Jeremy is finished pumping gas? He pulls out the nozzle and sprays it all over the car!"

"If I was the last person on earth... I would be the best in everything."

"Walk up to the finest girl in the club and whisper, ""excuse me, can I get at that outlet behind you hon?"""

"Why can't bikes stand up on their own? They are two tired."

"If you love somebody... Let them go. If they come back, no one wanted them."

"What do you get when you cross an Italian with a gorilla? A retarded gorilla."

"What do you call a bird that has been molested? Rustled Crow"

"I like my women like a microwave. She is hot and kills all the babies i put inside her."

"Always take one positive friend & one negative friend on road trips. Then if your battery dies, you can hook cables to them & start your car"

"How are women and tornadoes alike? They moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave."